Firstly i miss my helmet hair of mine.for those who have seen my hair already,why do u keep saying it looks nicer?seriously?i prefer my old hair better,hands down.School is getting on my nerves because i still cant take my exam till i have my membership card number and its kind of irritating me because its been 3 weeks sitting at home waiting for a stupid call from school.so what have i done this past 3 weeks?NOTHING!!!!!! I swear its the same routine as last time again.things just doesn't seem as colorful as before.I have a feeling im programed wrong or something.when i want something i must get it but after a few weeks i get bored with it.is it gonna be always like this or just on occasions?I dont really need anything right now,now the only thing that i feel is what i felt a year back.just me,azam and nizam and the usual people we hang out with.nothing else.nothing seems to interest/make me happy anymore.seems to me that time turning back again,Sometimes i wish we could all dream about the future and learn our mistakes and faults and redo everything again just to make it right.

I just wanna be left alone right now,im not in a clear state of mind

Time check 7.30am.reasons why im not asleep yet is only 2 things,a heavy heart and that i just got back home.So this is what happened.slept at 3am on Sunday morning.woke up at 11am for lunch with dad side of the family and got back at 4pm,slept till 10pm and wasn't in a really good mood.it got worse and worse as each hour ticked.and it was 4am monday morning when my anger took control.words were exchanged and left home at 6am took a cab to the place.handphone was silent,called till battery was flatted,people stared blankly at me as i stood there waiting.watched the sunrise on the 14 floor and finally after an hour,i gave up.I slowly walked back to the main road.took the longest cab ride of my life and got home.Best part is i have sch in 2 hours time and that i spent my last cent on cabs and ezlink left on $2 plus,and even better news that i don't have allowence for this week because used it all last week.watch Ironman 2!!!

all these actions have thier own meaning to it but the truth is that these are a few of the tiny things that never get noticed or appreciated.

hence why i have given up.

So school was okay.just that i hate Tuesdays and Wednesday now.i have to relive that again.gah

things are pretty much mundane now a days.planning to stop drinking and clubbing and cutting down on ciggys from now on.the first two is easy as pie,the third one the killer really.past few days didn't get much sleep.been lying in bed playing the what If game.for example like what if i meet u somewhere else?you know all the what if question u can think of in your head.been playing that game for 3 days straight,and seeing things now really makes me wonder sometimes,to me action speaks louder then words any day.I got to see it before i can believe it and Im not seeing anything really.Now that i see it all happening words can't really describe how i feel right now.is the one word for all the emotions that u could possibly feel?They should really make one and to me i think that word is screwed!

So been busy this few weeks with parties,outings,kim,army,school and was abit lazy to update aslo.So wonderful news is that i don't have to go army this year!!!yay!!got my deferment letter already.No more parties and late nights as school gonna start next week.so will be busy busy busy but the upside is that school is near town :D anyone wanna play some pool?hahaha

well went to universal studio like a week ago?if im right it was a Thursday,one day after that special day :D had fun with kim and my cousin and mom.not much crowd cause it was soft opening so every ride took about 5 mins to que which was awesome.it was raining on that day which spoiled my hair as you can see,manage to take all the rides before the park closed except the kiddy rides of course.pfft but all in all it was great but a one time thing cause there isn't much ride for the adults really.more of a kiddy land to me.watch fireworks after the whole day was done.still a great day spent.

will update if anything interesting comes up.

Hi.
I just want to let everyone know that I love this irritating guy in the above picture :)

And he's the reason why I'm still smiling right now. The one who's always there when all I want to do is to frown, the one who makes me happy when I'm feeling so down. He's the only one I have right now, and I don't know how am I going to survive without him in my life. I'm sorry if sometimes I can be too shy, or if I'm a bad liar. Forgive me if I joke around at the wrong time, or I nag at you too much. I'm sorry if I always complain, and always put you to blame. I'm sorry if I trouble you in any way, and also for depending on you too much. I'm sorry if I wear too much make-up, or make you carry my bag. But the most important thing, I'm sorry if I hurt that heart of yours, in any way. I just want to be the girl you think of at the start and end of the day.


♥♥♥

It's 2:02AM. He's not back yet, and he don't know how worried I am. Pig!
I love you lah.